When the Founding Fathers designed the Constitution, they explicitly made it so women couldn’t vote. Later, we decided that was simply a sign of the times, and everyone should have the right to vote. We like to right wrongs, and so we reversed this trend and gave women equal rights. What we failed to realize was that the Founding Fathers were geniuses and never intended for women to have the right to vote. "She said I couldn't touch these again, if she couldn't vote!"

I’m not a misogynist. I don’t believe that a woman’s role is in the kitchen or the bedroom. I don’t even believe that they shouldn’t be politicians. I believe women are capable of doing pretty much everything a man can do, except use logic. Women are illogical creatures, overrun by emotion, that believe the world should be remade in their image. Men tolerate and accept this behavior because breasts are delightful.

But, Ben Franklin was a stronger man than we are today.  Along with his posse, they developed a system that was woman immune. A system that would last through the centuries, even after the time they died. And they would’ve gotten away with it too, if it weren’t for…er…Sorry. I woke up to Scooby Doo. The point here is, they didn’t deny women the right to vote as a side note. They denied women the right to vote because they knew what we all know. Women are fucking crazy.

A face you can trust...

It is true what they say, behind every good man is a good woman. But, we need to remember that behind a good man is the place for a good woman. They think in ways that men cannot fathom, and come up with some of the best ideas around. But, for them, picking a politician is like picking a pair of shoes: chosen for looks, often times uncomfortable, and definitely not something to be worn more than once.

Now, I’ll admit that not all men should be allowed to vote either, but we already have laws that prevent convicted felons from voting…

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