I am rarely frightened of sales catalogs. I have been offended, disgusted, irritated and even titillated by them. Am I so old that I don't recognize the strategic marketing value of fear? Have my years of objective indifference to humanity finally caught up with me? In their latest marketing campaign they are calling it a FUNdamentals Sale. Call it whatever you want, but mannequins replacing hard working American models is wrong. I mean who is going to want to wank off to any of these caricatures? Where is the soft tissue of the Victoria's Secret or even Sears catalog? This whole scenario plays out like an Onion.com article, published by the Republican Party. Unfortunately, it's no joke and only speeds the cultural-employment death spiral we can all feel. Models losing their jobs?! When will this insanity stop! I submit the following as evidence in a trial of both bad taste and a testament for the inanimate that cannot defend themselves.
Look, I am the first to admit that I gave up on humanity a long, long time ago; But when marketing does rear it ugly head, it gives me pause. Don't be fooled by the 'slick' humor or cultural references....this is cost savings, wrapped in humor and digested by the fat guys upstairs to keep their cushy corporate libidos gyrating for another year. Need more proof?
This is like if the producers of Weekend At Bernie's decided to do a modern remake of Vincent Price's House of Wax for the MTV generaraton! And the "cast" delivers dialogue and comedy to parry anything those films had to offer. True horror material to be sure.
And it doesn't stop at the commercials, it's in the friggin stores! They stalk the sales isles and occupy every sales corner with their horribly perfect representations of what they think people aspire to become. It is beyond insulting that this company trolls the lowest depths to lure the stupid and most inept individuals to buy products based on this crap. Orange County, I am looking at you.
Now in their defense I will say that they have succeeded to do what few companies have ever achieved. And that is to blatantly insult everyone, Blacks, Whites, Asians, Hispanics the whole human race. And if you aren't embarrassed by this:
1. There is something seriously wrong with you.
2. You may be in the minority not represented here ie. American Indian.
3. Go and check out the great sale at Old Navy!
In the future Old Navy needs to leave the comedy to professionals in business suits in Manhattan. Or to 12 years olds borrowing their Dad's video camera to create a viral campaign. Either way, this approach to marketing is the Edsel of our time and an Epic Fail on so many levels it boggles the mind to think they aired such swine fodder.
I for one will be procuring my precious retro t-shirts, hoodies and cargo shorts from a more reputable establishment. I wonder if Kmart is still open?